terryfrost: (arab)
posted by [personal profile] terryfrost at 06:33pm on 23/06/2007
Third day of being sick with a bad cold, so I was sitting at home when I got a call from my brother's ex-wife Donna.

My father died on Friday morning.

Now for anyone else I know, such news would be a source of immense sadness, of loss, grief and even situational depression. Not for me. I'm sincere when I say that whether you know it or not, the World is a slightly better place now than it was at midnight last night. There are a lot of theologically based aphorisms about not speaking ill of the dead, but all we really owe them is the truth. I wrote my truth here in the first LJ post of this year.

[livejournal.com profile] queen_nephthys and I will probably going up for his funeral - mostly to support my sister Sandie who is the child he never acknowledged. Sandie needs closure on this, so she's travelling down from Brisbane to attend. I want to be there for her. I haven't seen my brother Garry in a dozen years, so doing so will be at least an interesting experience. Garry was closer to our father than I and he had the burden and curse of being the favourite son. I'm sure there were comforts in being the favourite, but I'm glad it was him rather than me.

I have a touch of insomnia right now, partly due to the cold I can't shake right now and partly because I'm self-monitoring, keeping a weather-eye out for an emotional storm that may hit at any time. Or maybe it won't. [livejournal.com profile] queen_nephthys came home from work when I called her with the news and she's been here for me.

Later today we have people over for a barbecue, but that's cool too. I want to celebrate life with friends and we're partly having the ritual of meat-burning to congratulate ourselves on the good job we did with Convergence. I think it's just what I need.

Later: the BBQ went well and a few LJ pals showed up too. Looks like the funeral is on Friday in Canberra, so [livejournal.com profile] queen_nephthys and I will be driving up Thursday to support Sandie.
Mood:: 'weird' weird
Music:: Requiem Pour Un Con - Serge Gainsbourg

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